Stress

Remember AR? This new person I've been getting to know at Zeta Mu?

He has spent the last week or so ignoring me. Or, well, at least being very distant and dismissive towards me. He talks to me if I talk to him, but compared to the cordiality we had a couple weeks ago, long late night conversations, and him being warm and greeting me whenever he saw me, this is definitely a drastic change.

I've been obsessing over this for the whole week, trying to figure out what happened, if anything.

I know, I know. I'm probably just wasting my time. Or worrying over nothing. The Professional was being really distant with me at one point and it had nothing to do with me. I'm aware that people have lives and all...

... but still, I'm pretty convinced that this is something unique to me since he's acting pretty much normally around everyone else.

It could be any number of things. I don't know him well enough to guess.

Since it happened right after we hooked up, it could be because he "got what he wanted" from me and then decided I wasn't worth his attention anymore.

Or maybe he feels awkward about it; regrets it.

Or maybe he actually really likes me but is trying to "play it cool" because that's what everyone else does here.

Maybe he's trying to be an asshole because he thinks that will make me more into him (well, I suppose it's working)...

Also, his (now ex) gf recently graduated. Maybe he was just using me to get over her and then realized that it didn't work.

Actually, after we hooked up I started being unnecessarily affectionate/touchy with him - not inappropriately so, but definitely more than before, maybe he didn't like that I was being too clingy.

And, I sent him a random angry email when I got drunk one night. Even though I apologized for it after, and I didn't even say anything specific about him, I was just venting about other stuff, he probably got upset by it or thinks I'm a crazy bitch by now.

And, a few days after we had hooked up, I went ahead and hooked up with the Professional. I'm pretty sure he saw us flirting in Zeta Mu's basement. Maybe he was hurt by that? But I don't even know how serious he was being about me. I'm so used to people here hooking up casually that I don't expect anyone to take things seriously anymore. Plus, just because I hooked up with someone else doesn't mean I'm not into him. I just don't see why I have to stop hooking up with other people when I find someone new to sleep with. And it's not like we even had sex more than once! ...Or even had penetrative sex, for that matter! Or are committed to each other in any way...

Maybe I'm being too greedy?

I mean, clearly I do like him, otherwise I wouldn't be stressing over this so much.

Why do I always fuck things up?

...Maybe I should just talk to the guy.

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